Listen up kiddies, it's story time. Well basically it's me going to be venting and stuff, but get over it.

Let's start at the beginning, last summer. At this point in time I was liking this girl and stuff and when I got my new phone my friend gave me her number. I should also mention that I had problems with depression at this time too. But, going back to the main topic, I started texting this girl through the summer. We really connected and all that and eventually ended up dating shortly after school started. Now it gets complicated. About two or three months in, she says I love you and I say it too. And I really fucking meant it. A lot. And so, that little feeling continued for two months or so and I really enjoyed it. Then over a period of a few weeks I started to get this weird felling while talking to her. Just this nagging in the back of my head. Then, around Christmas and the ensuing break, I told her about it, saying I would get over it and stuff. Well, I didn't really and it came to a head again like four days ago and I finally admitted to her and myself that I didn't really love her anymore, and maybe even didn't like her. Obviously that caused a problem. First she was angry I lied to her and I felt like shit and I meant it when I said I was sorry. Then she convinced me to stay because I realized that I still do at least like her and she said she really needed me in her life and I believed her. The next two days I had the same feeling, a little less, but still there. It was basically me arguing with myself whether to break up with her or not. Eventually, I told my mom about it, kind of, leaving out some key parts, and the feeling almost totally went away. We were together for a few hours ago and I really enjoyed just sitting and talking to her and for a few moments the feeling went away. I should also add that I don't really have to argue with it anymore because I can just ignore it. The only problem I have is that one, it's still there, though getting smaller, and two, it will be just so hard to come back from this. This isn't the same situation as the summer. I know I still like her and am attached to her though. I just think that I really need to get over the stupid things I've done and said and really try again the whole relationship thing. I still want to be with her, I just don't know how. I know I won't give up any time soon, assuming nothing gets worse. I just don't know. Things are hard. I want her, yet at the same time I sometimes don't. Sometimes she bores me, but that's usually only when she's in a bad mood or is really distracted or something. I just need help or something. I want everything to be back to the way it was, but I know it never will be exactly like that again. I want to fall in love with her again, and think I could. I just need to get over all this. Plus, I feel like I should have someone I can trust to talk to relationship problems to in the future. Which is what Lg is being a substitute for right now. Any comments?......also on a side not; I can't really imagine my life without her and don't want her to leave yet at the same time sometimes I fell like I just can't do this. I'm like filled with doubt. I want it to go away. Help