I need help reviewing my essay

19 Apr. 2010 07:19pm

I need someone to read through my essay and tell me my flaws and downparts of my paper.

Yes I know I am young and working on a highschool essay but thus should make it extremely easy

Here is the paper;

Bound By Insecurity

Drug use is a very common way of hiding from struggles and hardships. This is represented in Brave New World by Aldous Huxley. The government offers soma to the people of this fictional world, but is this world all that fictional? Offering the people soma allows the government to take complete control. The drugs allow the people of Brave New World a gateway to illusions where they can forget about their worries and problems. Huxley wants to show people the harm drugs can cause and how controlling the government can be.

Being insecure is a common reason for being susceptible to drugs. Teens abusing drugs is a large problem in the world today. Most teens do drugs because "they're insecure and they think drugs will help"(National Youth Anti-Drug Media Campaign). Drug use in Huxley's society is the foundation of the government, one of the main characters attempts to free the soma junkies of Brave New World "I'll teach you; I'll make you be free whether you want to or not" (213). Huxley represents the pressure that being insecure can cause us to do.

Governmental control over the distribution and regulation of drugs is the iron curtain of the drug world today. The government's outlaw of drug trafficking causes promotion of crimes and drug abuse "The outlawing of drugs clearly promotes organized crime by providing revenue generating avenues such as drug production, trafficking, and distribution" (Hubpages inc.). Drug distribution in Huxley's novel is done so by the world controller and hospitals, the drugs are used to keep the people of the world state under the steel hand of the government. Some takes the place of religion in Huxley's novel "Christianity without tears— that’s what soma is" (23

. In Huxley's novel soma and sex take place of religion.

Human weakness to the temptations of drugs is a major problem in insecure parts of the world, such as Africa. Drug trafficking has become a major problem in this part of the world "More recently, trafficking in heroin and cocaine has made narcotic drugs easily available across Africa despite the existing legal control measures"(Springer Science). In Huxley's novel the drugs are distributed by the government to insure that the people remain insecure so they don't rebel "what need we have of repose when our minds and bodies continue to delight in activity? Of consolation, when we have soma" (234). Their is a few exceptions to the governmental rule over this society such as Bernard, John and the controller who all find a way to avoid the grasp of the soma.Huxley tries to tell us that it is possible to find freedom in a world surrounded by insecurity and drugs.

Instead of sitting around waiting for your dose of insecurity to come around, stand up and make a decision to avoid it altogether. In Huxley's novel the entire world is addicted to Soma. If we could stand up together and avoid the impact that our government might strike upon us and avoid the temptations that Soma will cause to us.

**bobdule** · 19 Apr. 2010 09:03pm

i'd give it an A ;o

**Silence..** · 19 Apr. 2010 10:40pm

Grammer, Capitalization, Marks..

All's good.

I'd give it over 9000.

20 Apr. 2010 12:00am

It's a D paper at my school

20 Apr. 2010 05:48am

I will give C for writing as there were errors.

20 Apr. 2010 06:22am

Yet everyone is giving me a grade. It's already been done so by my teacher now it's my job to fix it.

Can none of you help me fix these errors of mine?

20 Apr. 2010 05:31pm

I'm 16. And if you don't know what Soma is I really doubt you can help me with my essay. So if you don't mind I would really like it if you would stop spamming my forum.

**Raivu** · 07 May. 2010 02:13pm

That's a good top-end essay

you've supported reasons, backed up your quotes and had a good conclusion. I'd give it a 4/5

Edit: The last sentence doesn't make sense. o.O

13 Oct. 2010 11:42am

I didnot find any flaws in your essay that you have written.

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