FML Thread

**Souleater** · 07-26-2011 03:33 AM

Ever had an experience where you have had to just say, "Fuck My Life?" Well if you haven't, there is an entire site that is dedicated to just those kinds of moments.

FML : Everyday life flop stories

Pick your favorites and post them here.

07-26-2011 03:34 AM

Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

**Ethan** · 07-26-2011 12:45 PM

Today, I called my seven-year old son to help me with the ice-maker on the fridge because it wasn't working. Without even pausing, he turned the child lock off and started laughing at me. FML

The funnier one I had seen was this one:

Today, I was at the park when I saw a homeless man sleeping on a bench. I thought it would be funny to throw a small rock at him. He thought it would be funny to pull out his knife and chase me for six blocks. FML

Only because I though of Boobrash. :3